These money stories are too common + how to heal them

(Do you feel “rich” when you go to the drive thru?)

In the past two weeks I’ve done several Akashic Record readings for people’s businesses and the topic of money always comes up. People notice they have some money patterns sabotaging their success and they are ready to change it.

I know what that feels like and I’ve taken and currently taking drastic actions to shift my latest money stories that have been showing up in my uplevels in my business.

Dollar in form of heart isolated on white backgroundThere are some money themes happening right now, see if you can relate:

  • If I make more money, people (usually family) will want something from me.  If they don’t make the money, they don’t have to have the uncomfortable conversation with the people who will want something.
  • If I make more money, I will lose it. The pattern of feast or famine shows up with this belief.
  • If I make more money, I will get take advantage of.
  • If I make more money, I will lose my spiritual connection.
  • It’s not right to accept money from clients if they will go into debt to pay me. The result? They sabotage their marketing or they accept clients who have money drama, which perpetuates their own money drama.
  • There just isn’t enough money. The lack belief shows up as reality when there is always more “month” than there is money every month.

I’m going to be really honest about something and I spoke about it at the beginning of the year.

I’ve had a six figure business for three years. I’ve had almost a multiple 6-figure business for three years. I know money well. I know how to make it. I know how to repel it. I know how to misuse it. I know how to lose it. I know how to love it. I know how to do good with it. I’ve noticed it’s not hanging around as much as I would like it to. I’ve got big family plans this year and it will require money to make those things happen.

I’m creating some big financial intentions this year. So big in fact, it scares me. Yet I have a peace about it that I’ve never had before.

I’m pushing up against money upper limits every single day. Always expanding. Always growing.

One thing I’m re-learning is if you want to have more of anything, you’ve got to sink deeply into a new relationship with it. I’m reading more books about money. I’m more vocal about money. I’m changing my relationship with money forever.

So how do you heal your money stuff?

It’s not just one little layer and then everything is set for life. And it doesn’t have to be so damn hard either.

money-1Step 1: Rather than setting a money goal, set a money game.

Get curious about it.

Try this experiment: I commit to make $____________ this month.

Now say this:

“Hmmmm, I wonder how $_____________ (the same dollar amount as above) would like to come into my life this month? How much fun could I have and receive $_________________?”

Notice how each of those two statements feel different in your body.

Here is one thing I know for sure, one person’s “formula” to make money isn’t going to be identical for you. You’ve got to find your path and this is a good place to start.

The biggest money myth I’ve heard and actually bought into is this “If I just heal this money block then money will show up easier.”

Healing money blocks is part of the solution. But changing your habits will create more than “healing” alone.

money-2Step #2: Heal through awareness and DECIDE.

Knowing where the money belief came from and the “root” as I like to call it, is part of the process. But it’s not enough. DECIDE to let it go.

This part takes brutal honesty. What part of you ENJOYS the money drama?

I recently read Larry Winget’s book “You’re Broke Because You Want To Be.” Why did I read it? Because the title pissed me off and if something bugs me enough then I know there is a gift for me there.

The book didn’t have anything new about money. But it did get me to ask myself some honest questions to really listen to the shadow side of money patterns.

What part of you enjoys the money drama? What part of you enjoys the fear and worry of it?

Or if you are having some stuff show up in your life where you now rely on others to take care of your financial commitments, what part of you enjoys that? People need a helping hand from time to time, but if that “helping hand” is turning into months and even years of the same pattern, it’s time to wake up.

I told myself for a long time that “It” was okay. I was living in a dumpy studio apartment praying my car would keep running. But it was okay because I was part of a Buddhist Sangha and I meditated and it was teaching me “non-attachment.”

Well I’m calling bullshit. That isn’t okay. So I got real with myself – that was about ten years ago. I went from making $26k a year to $60k a year in about five years. I’m in the process of getting real with myself again on a new level and creating savings and things that I kept telling myself that I will do “later.”

hardeesOne money pattern that showed up is when I didn’t feel “rich” I had this sudden craving to go to a drive thru and get fast food.

What the…???

As a kid my family didn’t have a lot of money. We never ate out. My mom babysat kids as a way to make some extra money. She would save up for when my siblings and I had a birthday then we would go to Hardees (a fast food joint) and we would each get a $.99 “Silly Sack,” which was the kids meal. We would play for hours in the kids area treasuring the hamburger, fries and soda. I knew we were “rich” when we did that.

So this belief carried over to my adult life…it’s the little things that show up to mirror our money beliefs to us. So now my decision is I don’t go to the drive thru when I want to feel “rich.” I CHOOSE my new belief that nourishes both my bank account and my body and I know I won’t find that nourishment in any drive thru.

money-3Step #3:  New Belief. New Action. New Proof. New Habit.

What is your new belief about money? Declare it. Now you’ve got to act on it. When you act on it, you have new proof that the new belief is real. When you do this enough, you create a new money habit.

Your money reality is what you do consistently, not when it’s easy and not just a couple of times.

This is the step that most people don’t make it to. Or they think it will change around in a few days or a month. You are unwinding YEARS of crappy habits. Consistency is key and it gets easier and easier.

The new action is to actually ACT on that new belief. I did this with someone who usually only called me to borrow money…the latest drama happened, they needed money for rent or a car payment or what ever. The other part of the story is they used their money for their drug and alcohol addiction.

I remember the first time I said no to the request to borrow money. I cried for hours. The ugly cry. It was heartbreaking but I knew that it wasn’t tough love, it was unconditional love to both the person and for myself. And it was really hard.

I now only give money to friends and family if I can give it as a gift, because I may never get it back. Money is a crappy way to ruin relationships.

And for you parents out there: stop bailing your kids out of their money messes. (Thanks to Larry Winget for echoing this message.) You chose to have kids so yes, it would be helpful to support them. And it’s not your responsibility to pay for their weddings, cars and even their education <gasp!> It’s okay to disagree with me on this – you do what works for you.

Taking new actions may mean saying No more often.

It might mean cutting up your credit cards. It might mean picking up the phone and asking people who owe you money when they’ll be making a payment.

It may mean to have conversations with debtors and get on a new payment plan to get the energy moving in the right direction.

It might mean to look at your bank account every day to get more connected with your money.

A new action might mean to raise your rates because you know the old rates are a way of hanging on to the old money patterns in your life.

I’ve done all of these things I’ve mentioned.

circleIf you would like support with uncovering the money patterns at the soul level, an Akashic Record reading is a really quick and accurate way to do it. But promise me that if you do a reading that you will take action to create a new money story because awareness by itself won’t change anything. Trust yourself enough to act on your awareness and that is where the magic happens.

If you haven’t signed up yet for and Intuitive Business Circle (live or virtual), sign up today for only $47 where you can get the answers to your money blocks and get clear direction on how to heal them along with the actions to take to create a new money story!