My whole life I’ve felt a little bit like an outsider.
I have memories of sitting in school as a kid and all the way through college wondering why I was getting taught stuff like math and algebra and science and social studies when I had bigger work to do in the world.
It was a conscious question. Almost like looking at people move in slow motion wondering “why are these people doing all of this?”
I remember looking around at the other students who seemed more engaged than I was and I wondered what was wrong it with me because I wasn’t focused like they were.
If it wasn’t for my art and writing classes growing up, I likely would have dropped out of school entirely. That was the only time I felt like I could express myself. So I got the label as the quite artsy girl.
I was never the popular kid. I was never the life of the party.
I was the quiet girl in the corner observing people and being utterly confused and intrigued at human behavior.
I’ve always been the observer. I was the person who would walk into any room and immediately know what was going on. I knew when my teachers were stressed at home. I knew the kids who went home to abusive environments.
No one said anything, it was just the feeling I got.
You see, I thought everyone picked up on this stuff. I thought everyone had conversations with their mom about intuition and God and loving people in the world.
Nope. When I got older I realized that this was not the normal conversation people were having.
How could people live in this world and not talk about this stuff?
Then as I got older I realized that a lot of people are asleep. Numb. Following the system of “being noticed” so they could feel popular, but not following their own heart.
Here is what puzzles me today:
How has building a business been turned into a popularity contest? And why are so many people buying into it? Why did I buy into it?
When I look on Facebook, I skim past the stuff that is just there for show. The stuff that has the energy of “proving how successful I am.” I’ve done it too.
There is a difference in energy when you talk about what you are creating because it’s your divine brilliance vs proving your value to people to be popular.
The truth is, you don’t need to be popular to be successful in business. You don’t need to show your latest trips to show your success IF you are doing those things to PROVE to others why they should like you.
Building your business the way you want to will make you unpopular. Some people won’t like you.
Look at how much money you want to make.
If you were to charge premium pricing for your services because you know your value and you trust people to create their own results with what you provide to them, how many clients do you really need every year to make that happen?
I used to think I wanted a multi-million dollar business. I could see my name in lights. And glitter would explode from the ceiling as took my place on stage and inspired thousands of people.
I didn’t care about seeing my name in lights. I cared about living my purpose. I cared about feeling joyful every day. I cared about how I treated others because I’m a kind person not because of what will happen to me after I die or because of what I want people to think.
I stepped into making choices that I knew would make me unpopular but living someone else’e vision for my life was suffocating.
I embrace being the one to “dreams too big” and the one who gets “too emotional” about business because I actually give a shit. About you. About me. About the world.
And it gets to be a lot some days. Caring that much. Feeling that much. Knowing there is a bigger purpose that we are all a part of. It’s rich and gorgeous and sensual and amazing. Some days it’s hard.
Your business…the one that you really want to build doesn’t need to make you fit it. It won’t make you popular.
Isn’t it funny that we all want to “stand out and be unique” yet when we start on that path we shrink back because not enough people like us.
What your authentic business will do is serve the people you are meant to serve. It will make you the man or woman who is someone you’ve always hoped you would become. It will stretch you and pull you and make you feel like a crazy person chasing crazy dreams and when you breathe that in, you know you are living your purpose. Ahhhhh and that feeling is so intoxicating you wonder why you didn’t do this earlier.
So you put THAT photo of you experiencing your success that you worked your ass off for on Facebook and the energy is one of sharing your brilliance because it’s your authentic voice.
That is the kind of business that is available for you.
Forget about the popularity contest. Focus on the handful of people you can really serve each day. Be true to yourself.
Be okay with being a misfit. The crazy one. The dreamer. Because you know what? You are a Doer. Someone who makes things happen.
Here is to you standing out!